Love Letter 4
Thinking of you makes me smile. Knowing you're out there, being able to feel you, and having that heaviness settle over me when I think of you is comforting. I wish we were telepathic though, it wouldn't matter where you were if I were able to talk to you with my thoughts. That would be pretty awesome. But I guess I'm not that evolved.
Whenever something bothers me, I would watch videos of the cosmos and look at the billions upon billions of stars in a galaxy and think about how small I am or my problems are. Could you be on one of those stars or maybe another planet or even another galaxy light years away? What about in another dimension? Why am I stuck in this primative backwater planet then? Come find me and kidnap me please. I've actually talked to my parents about this. I'm lucky to have a wonderful family that loves me alot, so much so that they said if I could be happy elsewhere I should go. But the problem is I don't know where to go, which country or city?
I have enough money to go anywhere in the world to find you, but I don't even know where to start. I think that if I went to another country, it'll just be the same thing. Meeting or dating guys and knowing that they are not you. It'd be a waste of time. I think that you'll be able to help me grow and be a better person. I'm trying to break away from the "collective" thinking and trying to find the truth in things. I know that we would complement each other, and fit like a puzzle piece. I know you're smarter than me, there's so much information and knowledge out there I'm just comprehending a small portion of it.
My friend thinks I'm obsessing over someone that's not even human. It made me laugh when he said it but he might be on to something. For instance, most humans' ability to feel and to experience is limited like for example when people love it's usually just lust or infatuation or liking, or if it is indeed love, then it lasts for a few years on average. Now imagine and think of the vastness of an emotion like love, what if that emotion was as deep as the ocean and eternal and vast and unconditional? And what if that love spans multiple lifetimes, across time and space?
When you say "I love you" I know it is unconditional and pure. It is an unselfish type of love, where you want the best for me, let me be me and to grow, and you'd do the best you could to not say or do anything to hurt me because hurting me would be like hurting yourself. I think that 0.5-1% of the population will be able to comprehend something like this or even try to be like that. To expect that of you, I would have to expect that of myself and I am fine with that. The only problem is if I'm with someone that isn't my soulmate, if he isn't you, and if he doesn't think like that.
Actually, I don't even care if you're an alien, vampire, werewolf, djinn (genie), ghost, or some other entity. That's just a physical manifestation. What I care more about is your spirit, your heart and your soul. I want to see inside and know who I am dealing with and who I am with. I want to see kindness, light, and radiance. I want to cry like I've never cried before, but in happiness. I know finding and having you is like winning the jackpot but I know that I'm lucky and blessed. I miss you, my love, please be well until I find you.